..

i was walking home after practice..
and i dunno why, but i just started crying.
it was as if all my frustrations, all my worries, all my inner longings were embodied in my tears.

ya, we had a really bad worship practice, and that just added fuel to the flame.. but i wasn't crying for that . i pinpointed why exactly all these tears were flowing down my face. it was cuz an image popped into my head. an image of myself at home, hugging my dad. its so strange, i never in a million years thought that THAT would bring me to tears! me, the one who's so stoic when it comes to crying. i miss you dad. i miss the warmth i get when i'm in your arms, i miss that sense of security, knowing that when i'm in your embrace, everything will be ok. its like you put a spell over me. and now, just thinking about you is putting me to tears all over again.. stop grace. stop crying. why are you so weak right now? why do you miss home so much? why are tears flowing down your face? just stop. please..