1. what great gift has God given you?
2. where does fear fit into the picture?
get up. walk. do great things. no regrets.

last night i dropped the ball.
God always provides you with 'divine appointments'
He gives you so many chances to show others His love

last night he gave me a chance, he left the door ajar.. and i kinda blew it. i was walking to Gavin's birthday and had just bought some stuff when I passed by a homeless lady sitting on the street. I stopped in the middle of the street about 2 meters from her. She must have thought I was some crazy lady just standing there. I was debating like mad in my head what to do. To keep on walking to gavin’s thing? Or to stop and talk to her? I just stood there like a silly girl, wondering what to do, and then my feet start moving away from her. I kept on walking forward…

… regrets. Don’t have them. ..Forgive me Father.

Ever have an emotion so overwhelming it almost brings you to tears? You can’t even describe what it is… friendship, understanding, warmth, security... all bubbling up from the past rolling into one huge overpowering nostalgic feeling of love. The fact that one phone call from you had me forcing these tears back last night… gosh I missed you so much, and I didn’t even know it. It’s been so long since we last talked. I’m sorry that I forgot about you. You’ll probably never read this, but I love you… so much.

I love you because you’ve always been my shoulder to laugh and cry on.
You’ve always acted so strong in front of me for the both of us
You were, are and forever will be someone I look up to and respect
You are someone always true to his word
Someone who inspires me to try harder
Who challenges me to think deeper
Someone who stood up for me and looked out for me
Who I know will always be there for me every time I fall…

I almost forgot you cared.
I almost forgot just how much I really loved you.

i love you leahcim

life is a constant struggle for perfection.
the most dangerous thing for a Christian is when we begin down the wide road marked for the self-righteous, thinking all along that we're 'safe'
..
God, thank you for bringing her to me. crazy timing that i'd bump into her at that moment... i guess you can expect nothing less, cuz your timing is always perfect.

To sinful patterns of behaviour that never get confronted and changed.
Abilities and gifts that never get cultivated and deployed --
Until weeks become months
And months turn into years,
And one day you're looking back on a life of
Deep intimate gut-wrenchingly honest conversations you never had;
Great bold prayers you never prayed,
Exhilarating risks you never took,
Sacrificial gifts you never offered
Lives you never touched,
And you're sitting in a recliner with a shriveled soul,
And forgotten dreams,
And you realize there was a world of desperate need,
And a great God calling you to be part of something bigger than yourself --
You see the person you could have become but did not;
You never followed your calling.
You never got out of the boat.
- Gregg Levoy

.........................

why is it so tough to reach out to the homeless?
what a horrible feeling it is when you lend a helping hand only to be shunned
I can't even begin describe the look and the feeling that is burned into you
that look where you feel less than human
its as if you can hear their eyes saying 'who do you think you are'
every time I go out, I say the same prayer… "Lord, teach me to love"
and every time I go out, I feel so fruitless, so inadequate

God gives and takes away.. And then it dawns on you
that he gives so that it CAN be taken away
he gives so that you can have a heart that gives as abundantly as his
you could have easily been born into a life of poverty, where dignity becomes a distant friend
But God was gracious enough to provide for you so that you could provide for others.
I hate the corruption this world has in stupid divisions between socioeconomic status
I hate how people are judged according to the dollar sign attached to them
the coolest new technology, the latest fastest car, the abercrombie designer clothes
whats it all for in the end?
worst of all, I hate how I'm folly to it too at times
you look around and you're fed up with the way things work in this world
and then you look a little closer and you see that you're the problem

I once was lost, but now I'm found
Was so far away, but now I'm home
I once was blind, but now I see
I once was dead, but now I live
Now my life to you I give
Let my lifesong sing to you
Hallelujah
Thank you for life Lord. As I turn 21, I can say with full confidence I'm Yours, and that's all that matters. I'm satisfied & utterly content